Can You Believe It?

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Just when things settle down, all hell breaks loose! Lets start with Friday. I had to go to court because my ex’s ex filed for emergency custody for his Son (4y.o.) by her. I thought it would be just us two but in total there were seven! I was surprised so many people showed up against her. If that doesn’t blow your mind imagine if her own brother were there. Well, he was and not to support her. The thing I found about whats been happening between them and our sons made me angry. Each of the other "wittinesses" had something to testify about what they saw as a reason why my ex is not a good mom. I am not sure if I want to write what they said but I will ask them to comment or for permission. I did not see these thing but they sadly do not surprise me and only confirm some things I had suspected about her. Her brother wrote a two page letter to give to the court and said he would e-mail me copy or paste it into a comment. I have not read it either. I am not eager to either because it will make me worry about my Son even more. My ex has "problems" but is in denial. Back to the court thing, You would thing the judge would be anxious to hear all these people who took the time to come in person. But for what ever reason the judge never call one single person! Not one! Her ex came out pissed! He said they believed everything she said! So they have a temp order for equal time! How could the court just brush off all us people worried for our kids. ???

By the look on her face when she saw all the people lined up to go against her, including her brother, she turned as white as a ghost. She did not know we were going to be there either. I almost felt sorry for her, almost. She was not happy I was there either but she had plans to get me back. Pay back is a bitc*.

I called my ex last Thursday as "ordered" and told her my plans for sat. We were going to the old trains for a ride and a picnic along the Brandywine River. We were going to take pics to send to his grand mom, my Space and others. Now for the pay back thing…I first must say that the court "order" does say I have to have a ride so she won’t have to drive him to me or I don’t drive myself while license was suspended. Well I had my suspension lifted so that is not an issue any more. Second it says I have to have some where to go once I pick him up, supervision because she said I would try to kidnap him. When I got there she opened the door and said I could not have him because I was alone and did not have "supervision". I had picked him up before when it as convenient for her a few times but now she is mad and it is a different thing. My son my right there and he was visibly upset not to be going to the trains like we planed. I told my Son not to worry that I WAS going to be taking him. I calm told her I was going to have to call a cop and come back, She said I won’t matter. I said "watch". I drove to a phone and called her ex and told him what she was up to and he said he would be the "supervision" and would be rushing to help me.(cool) Then I called 911 and had the cop meet me at a mall near by. I told him my side and he followed me to her apartment, went in to get her side. he told me about the supervision thing and I told him my "superv." is running late. The cop was cool enough to wait 10 minutes. 8 loooong minutes later her ex shows up. The cop goes in to bring out my Son and she flips out to see her ex is my "superv.". She argued with the cop for 15 minutes in her apt, in front of my Son. The cop comes out and tell me that she won’t "allow" him to be the person. SHE will only "allow" my brother in-law to be with me and my Son. So I had to drive off to find a pay phone (she would of course not let me use hers). I found one about 2 mile away and called my bro in-law. He was home and agreed to rush over to get us. I went back to her apt, ex and the patient cop. He showed up and we left. It was about 1:30pm. I was to have him from 11:am and was there at 10:55am waiting to knock on her door for him. We were too late for the trains it left at 1:00pm. Again despite the efforts of many people she won. She knew I’d end up with him, that was not her intention. It was to ruin my day and take up all the time she could. She succeeded! My Son and had to suffer for her savory victory. My Son and I got his bike out and we both rode bike (his w/training wheels) we had fun for the shortened visit. It was a sad ride to drop him off. My ex and her new b.f were standing outside wait when we pulled at 3:27pm. We both got out and he gave me a big hug and kiss good bye. I told him we would do the train thing next time, he said "ok" and ran inside her apt. I left w/out even looking at her.

Monday morning I have to go back to court to file more papers to modify the visitations to reflect my regained driving privileges. The sad part is that in about 6 weeks we will have the useless "Mediation" hearing. Then after not settling thing in there we’ll have to wait another 8 weeks for a real trial to get things fixed. If she filed for the same thing she would have a trial in 1 1/ months, but I always have to wait a long time for my filings. Some one must not like me in the court house I guess. They must know I don’t like them too much.

It helps to know that I am not alone in my opinion of my ex, but it does make me worry about my Son even more…tom g

21 Replies to “Can You Believe It?”

  1. Tom, I find it terrifying as well that all of these court systems seem to work against the best interest of the child/children. They do not seem to care about them at all, just go by the books. I continue to pray for you and your beautiful child to be together. Hang in there you are doing fantastic!!!

  2. thanks for posting WHAT you could i know its difficult to say the least im sure your son cherrishes every second he can be with you and i hope some day you,ll have him in your own custody… true the females just shed a tear and the men are fu,ked but if there is a god above he will see who is best for the boy and maybe the ex can get some help…keep on pressing on

  3. Are you still working with someone to help you with this? I am thinking of you and will send extra blessings your way.Sabine

  4. don’t give up she’s nuts you are doing what my father never bothered to do for me or my sister in the end he will understand who was looking out for him

  5. Just floating around space and came to your site. I feel so badly for you. I wish my own kids dad would show even an ounce of caring, but he doesn’t and it gives good fathers, like you, a bad name when there are fathers that truly care about their child/children. I wish you luck in your struggles here!Take care,T

  6. Good luck with court issues. Remember Monday is Labor Day, so the court might not be open. ??? The video is interesting. Rather cool NASCAR moves there. Too bad the sport doesn’t do those more often. LOL Just came to look around Spaces and stopped to say hi… HI! =)Tammy

  7. Tom,thank you for asking if you can add my site. I never asked you I just put you on it, I feel rude now. Of course you have my permission I am flattered you are asking.

  8. Tom,I have never published a comment but I have read all of your entries. However yesterdays blog left me with wanting to say a few things that may help you. First of all I would like to say a few not so friendly words to your ex-wife that may or maynot end up in a fist fight! 🙂 HAHA Jk! But if I ever did see her act like that in front of your son……..Anyway, here are a couple things that may give you some hope about full custody of your son. My father died when I was fourteen and left me and my brother and sister with my mom. Whom (like your ex wife) has "problems" that she wont face. My mom is as twisted and seflish as your ex wife. She didn’t want to to care of us before my dad died but once there is money involved… Needless to say that there was a custody battle between my mother and my grandparents on my fathers side. And through it all my grandparents won! So, Tom, there IS hope for you, just don’t give up!! Your a great dad!Angelina

  9. That is scarry that there is so many people that show up against her for her other son and you have your son in the same house. Something fishey must be going on that that is not right. She sounds like she is getting more and more unusual every day. I can understand her side that everyone is wanting to take her kids away and if someone tried that with me I would go nuts, But if i was not with my fionce anymore it would take a lot to get a new guy in the house. He would have to pass all the tests. I dont think that is going to happen but it is not right for her to have all these men in the house right away. When you have a new guy you have to pay attention to that person or they are not going to stick around, they will usually accept the kids at first but it is hard because it is not ‘theirs’ then they start to crave attention. I am sure that is what is happening and why everyone is mad at her but there is nothign that can be done unless you can get custody. This really sucks that there are people that are this nuts. But to me there are those people that should not have kids. I know you are a good father and she was probably a good mother at the time but some people that do not have their head on straight lose it when they get older and they just wnat to go through the "party" stage and not take care of their responsibilities…..Good luck with the court stuff. I will be checking on you!!!

  10. COURTS SUCK! JUDGES SUCK! Fairness- not in family courts…$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ and still nothing! Remember this….if all would do whats right …. who would make any money at it???????????? the lawyers would desevingly starve, the judges would be in competition with the maytag man! etc Harmony, hell if there was any the situation would never of gotten this far! No wonder angry people wait until they get a clear shot! and take it! push, push, push and caring fathers get the crap! F*%# the system! same shity in PA.!

  11. Since the day I have came to your space. I began to pray and I know that God is looking out for you. You just watch and see God Has your back through it all. I am praying for you. YOu will get your son watch!

  12. Oh no! Definately pass this along to your attorney. He/she needs to know about this incident. This totally stinks for your and your son. We are rooting for you guys.

  13. Yes, your attoney needs to know everything. Keep pushing ahead Tom, even though it is hard. Yes, it is sad you son has to see this, but it will not be forever. It only seems that way. My prayers are with you always.Deb

  14. wow,,, i’m wore out ,,,and i only read what you went through.Tom,,,remembers,,,what comes around ,,,goes around!Keep smiling,,,,especially in front of your Buddy. And Honey,,,never talk bad about Hre,,,,EVER,,,,you will win in the end. Daddy never talks bad about Mommy,,,hmmmmm ,,,But mommy?Cheering you on. Love ShnevPSI wouldn’t post that letter,,,,or the comments of other involved,,,keep this your thing,,,your venting!!Just a suggestion

  15. Hi, I just had to comment and tell you that though your struggles are many, you obviously see the importance and significance of it enough to NOT give up on them. This says alot about you as a man, and will say alot to your son, who I believe you will win in the end, about how to be a man. This world has lost far too many good men, they don’t seem to exist much anymore except for a few of us still out there keeping up the fight. You are an inspiration to me and I’m sure many others. Keep up the good fight!

  16. HI TOM: i am with you all the way and i will hold you and ur children in my prayers and do not worry have faith and god will always carry you,when u cant go on, also remember in the end she as well as all will be judged and she has hamed gods gifts and his most precious lives and for that she will also answer please do not give up, fight and with god on ur side no one can come against well and jesus loves you. oh ps may i have ur email please

  17. More Baby Mama Drama..seems to never end.My Stepdaughters( SD) mom ( BM) is just like your ex.The only differencre is SD’s BM can’t read court papers.She loves to try and re word what they say to suit her. We have had to call the police on her a couple of times. She screams and yells and it gets her no where.I wish you luck and I pray that some day things will be better for your son.Your Ex is hurting your son so much. He will grow up and turn against your ex for the way she is acting.~♥~Michele~♥~

  18. Tom,I am so sorry you have had to go through this. This is just plain mean and vindictive. I sounds like she is nothing but trouble for you and all her ex’s and even her kids.You know if you ever need anyone to talk with let me know. I do have a good ear for listening. I don’t really like giving advice cause im not a therapist.You are doing everything within your powers to be there for your son, yet it seems as though she is holding that back from you, or atleast trying to. Thank good ness for your ex bro in law .Ex bro and ex boyfriend to the rescue.Everything works out for a reason and there is a reason why you are having to do this, yet you and all of us haven’t figured it out yet. You will win and you will survive. You and Logan. Keep standing strong and you’ll keep moving forward to something that is beyond rewarding.Friends,Patti

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